Broken

Mixsie Fun Books InstaChat With Ufuomaee On ‘Broken’ And Sexual Abuse


Hi all!  I was privileged to be invited for a LIVE CHAT to talk about my free novel, Broken by Ejiro Osakede, Founder of Mixsie Fun Books.  We met at Aimee’s Library’s “A Book In Hand Live” event, which by God’s grace I was invited to attend as one of the Authors Readers were going to meet to talk about my novel, The Church Girl, writing, relationships and more.

Mixsie Fun Books are producers of ebooks and audio books, particularly for the African writers and readers.  We will be working on turning Broken into a free audio book as well.  This is an answer to my prayer, and I know God is just behind this set up!!!  I’m really excited about it, and I can’t wait to share with you the finished product.  Check out some of their other audio books here – https://www.mixsie.site/

So, Ejiro read my book, Broken, and had lots of good things to say about it.  She shared her review on Instagram here – https://www.instagram.com/p/Ba_xK62F6W1/?taken-by=ejiroosakede.  As a follow-up to this review, I was invited to chat about my book, with a special focus on Sexual Abuse on Instagram.  It was supposed to be a live video session, but the network wouldn’t permit that, so we chatted on the post here – https://www.instagram.com/p/BbCrNHjgTVR/?taken-by=mixsiefunbooks.

The chat might be a little hard to follow, so I’ve done a transcript here, for those of you interested in reading it.  I shared about why and how I wrote the book, and gave some advice for those who have been abused, sexually or otherwise, on how to heal and grow from it.  I shared some tips on how parents can protect their children from sexual abuse.  I also shared some advice about writing, for young and aspiring authors!  I had an amazing time on this last night.  I hope you are blessed as you read through.

By the way, as I am promoting Broken on Okadabooks, it currently goes for N100 on that platform.  You can still download it from Smashwords free or read it direct from my blog, blog.ufuomaee.org.  However, all proceeds from the sale of the book on Okadabooks goes towards my work at Fair Life Africa Foundation.  Thank you!


mixsiefunbooks: It’s almost time for our discussion. Are you guys ready??? 7pm is the time. Make it a date 😘

#mixsie #mixsiefunbooks#mixsieproduction #live #meet #meetup

ufuomaee: Hey @bluey702 it’s happening here in 2 mins

bluey702: @ufuomaee Hey girllllll….@mixsiefunbooks hiiiii

ufuomaee: @bluey702 hi Sis 🙂

mixsiefunbooks: @bluey702 Hiiiii😗. Thanks for joining us.

iammagnus1: Yoooo people. Magnus of Okadaboooks here to feed on the answers and learn as well 😂😂😂

mixsiefunbooks: @iammagnus1 😂😂😂😂 you are an intresting person. Thanks for joining us

ufuomaee: @iammagnus1 hi!!! Thanks for joining us

mixsiefunbooks: Hello everyone, so the network won’t allow us on the live broadcast. So we are bringing the chat here. Good evening and welcome to Live Chat with the Author. Our guest today is @ufuomaee author of Broken. Hello @ufuomaee how are you today?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I’m awesome! How are you?

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee I’m doing great. Thank you. So my first question is what Inspired the book Broken?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks well, it was from the time I spent on a particular blog. Well, The Naked Convos

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Can You Tell Us A Little About That?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks the audience there seem obsessed with sex… and there was one story by Sally, Little Black Book that was running and they really loved it

ufuomaee: I followed it too, though it isn’t usually the kinda stuff I read. There was something her main character said that really rang a bell with me about how broken we are, when we can’t have normal sexual relations

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee ok. But how did you get to join the blog?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I was a contributor on the platform. They posted my articles and stories

ufuomaee: I got a leading from God to write Broken after that.

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Oh Great!!!

ufuomaee: So, I actually wrote Broken for that audience.

ufuomaee: I wanted to write something that would grab their attention, keep their attention and also minister the Gospel to them

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I have made a number of comments that I didn’t tag you in. I was trying to be fast, but I will make sure I tag you in all.

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee I See

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee So when you began writing Broken, did you know how it was going to end? I mean did you have the complete story in your head before you started writing?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks no. Of course I knew God’s love would over come all…that was the message I was communicating, but I didn’t know how it would happen. I didn’t know Promise, my character!!!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Wow! That’s amazing. When you finally got a glimpse of who promise was how did it make you feel as a woman?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks well, actually, I don’t know how to answer that. Promise didn’t know who she was until God delivered her at the end. I wrote the story as Promise, so I was also lost in that confusion for a while going through all her feelings and all. But God helped me keep focus and bring something beautiful from it.

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Cool

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I guess I felt more understanding about women who have such sexual urges, especially women who have been abused

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee interesting. Talking about sexual abuse. Precious didn’t consider what happened with her and Uncle Bill as rape as she wasn’t forced to do it but rather convinced she was making uncle bill happy. What role should parents play in safe guarding their kids from this mentality of making others happy especially when it is someone/ a close relative they are fund of?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks parents need to teach their children about abuse, what is a safe and appropriate touch and what is inappropraite.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks children need to know that their bodies are their own and they havr private parts that even Mommy and Daddy shouldn’t touch!

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks children should be taught and encouraged to speak up whenever anyone touches them inappropraitely to makes them do things that they are uncomfortable with

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks parents also need to be vigilant to make sure that the people who have contact with their children are trusted and Still have regular conversations, do checks to ensure that the child isn’t learning sexual things from their nannies or househelps

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Hmmmmm. Shouldn’t they also let the kids know it’s ok to complain when someone else touches them in these sacred places?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes of course they should

mixsiefunbooks: Cos I feel kids are aware they shouldn’t be touched in certain parts of their bodies, but then when it happens they are also scared to say it especially since they’ve been threatened by their violators

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes, you’re right. They need a sort of Assertiveness training. It’s a similar training parents give their children on STRANGER DANGER

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks when it comes to child protection, vigilance is essential. we should not be so worried about offending people as we are about protecting our child. That was Promise’s mother’s mistake

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Very True. She suspected something was wrong but didn’t want to offend her elder brother. Well said sis.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks unfortunately, that’s a breeding environment to abuse and exploitation – fear!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Very True. So I assume we should also teach our kids to be fearless :):)

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes!!!

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks we need to teach them what respect is, and how that is different from fear and allowing people use us. They should know that they also deserve and should command respect. Respect is reciprocal

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Awesome. Looking at some of the lessons I drew from reading this amazing story. Yes it is true and sadly so that about 8 out of every 10 young girl has experienced sexual abuse at one point in their lives. How do they move past that experience to becoming all God made them to be? Cos promise was held captive by this for so long

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks moving past abuse starts with a recognition of your true worth

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks there is no more beautiful picture than the cross. There, God tells us what we are worth to Him – EVERYTHING

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Hmmmmm

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks so, it is very good for us to address this broken link first, if we want to succeed at other stragegies. self identity and worth is what has been attacked and destroyed by abuse. The Cross restores it

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee And truly He alone can teach us to truly value ourselves the way He values us.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks also, the Cross says that no matter how ugly they are, what they have done, they are forgiven and accepted

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks the Cross also teaches them to forgive others and thereby heal. Forgiveness is fundamental to healing. Like they say unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting your enemy to die. Forgiveness is liberating…and the abused are in bondage to their abuser until they liberate themselves with forgiveness

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks also, it is important for them to know what abuse it and to know that they never asked for it and never deserved it. THAT IS WHY IT IS CALLED ABUSE. so many victims blame themselves for what they went through. This is also important. As well as forgiving your abuser, be gracious to yourself. love yourself

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee hmmmm.. and sometimes they even find it hard to forgive themselves.

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee 👌👌👌👌👌👌

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee So So True. All the time I spent reading the story, I kept asking myself are there guys like Ope on planet earth? 🤤🤤🤤🤤

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks lol! There are! Every child of God is an Ope!!! That is the potential we have in Christ. We are called to imitate Christ and be like Him. and love one anothet likr He loved us. that was all Ope tried to do

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee I agree that, that is our default setting as children of God, born of the spirit and the blood, but seriously how many still operate by this default setting?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks what do you mean by still? Is it the world that would change God’s potential? If we are truly born of the Spirit of God, we shouldn’t expect less from Believers

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks If we see so few people showing this kind of love, it only reveals the scarscity of those with genuine faith. Jesus asked: When the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the Earth?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks Jesus also said: You shall know them by their fruits. And again: “Love one another as I love you. BY THIS all men shall kmow that you are My disciples” John 13:34

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee My Point is, we all have a choice to make. To stick to the original plan and not be conformed to what gives around us. May God help us all.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I am not denying that it is hard and such is rare…but True Christianity is UNCOMMON

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee True

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks we certainly need the grace of God to endure all. evn Ope did not stay… he ran!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Hahahahaah. Ha He tried!!!

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes, he fought a good fight…and he still hung on and stayed faithful while he waited for God to do His work. Even in our weakness, God is gracious

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee That is a typical example of amazing grace!!!!

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes… God was gracious to Promise…and to Ope. Neither of them fulfilled all righteousness. Ultimately we NEED God to please God, hence Jesus came to die for us and empower us by His Spirit

ejiroosakede: @ufuomaee Indeed And His power is so efficient if only we trust and obey.

ufuomaee: @ejiroosakede that’s it right there! Trust and Obey. Promise’s sister, Kemi broke it down for her. Those are they two qualities that validate FAITH. If one is missing, it isn’t faith

ejiroosakede: For the benefit of those who would love to read this book how would they get it @ufuomaee ?

ufuomaee: @ejiroosakede Pls, follow me 🙂 and follow the link in my bio. You can connect to my Okadabooks page. Or type this in your browser to get there: www.okadabooks.com/user/ufuomaee

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee are there other books authored by you?

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks yes… Pls follow link in my bio to my author pages, particularly at Okadabooks. All my books are available there 🙂 The one I am promoting is The Church Girl.

ejiroosakede: For anyone following this thread, do you have any questions? Pls let’s read from you.

ufuomaee: If anyone else has any more questions, feel free to ask me. I will be happy to answer here. If you would prefer to chat privately, hit me up for a chat or email me@ufuomaee.com

mixsiefunbooks: Hello guys go get a copy of Broken on @okadabooks the link is on @ufuomaee‘s bio. Go check it out and do remember to drop a review. It’s just 100naira

mixsiefunbooks: Please can you mention other books written by you @ufuomaee ???

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks OF COURSE!!! Please 😁

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks Thanks so much 🙂

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Waiting For The Mention. And there after you can drop your final words and we call it a night

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks I also wrote The Church Girl, which is a story about an orphan, Mary, who was abused by her Pastor

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks An Emotional Affair is a story about Lola, a neglected wife who falls for rich man, Danny, who tries to woo her from her husband, Bolu

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks A Small World is a seasonal story series that carries on the stories of tbe characters in my three main books, The Church Girl, An Emotional Affair and Broken. I have published Season One as an ebook, and I am current running Season Two as a story series on my blog, blog.ufuomaee.org.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks If you are interested in knowing how Promise and Ope faired in marriage after they reconciled, then you should read A Small World 😁

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Awesome Stuff. Well done ma’am. More ink to your pen.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks all my books and a link to my blog are available via the link in my bio. Or go to blog.ufuomaee.org. Register for free to follow my current series 😉

bluey702: Hey dear @ufuomaee I struggled with this book

mixsiefunbooks: @bluey702 Why Is That Ma’am?

ufuomaee: @bluey702 really? why?

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Ok. Thanks for sharing..

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks thank you so much! I am blessed by the opportunity you gave me here today. God bless you!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Amen!!!! And you too. Thanks for honouring my invitation.

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Any advice for young writers??

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks Okay… I have some.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks first of all, I believe we all should key in to the giver of gifts, God! And the most creative, imaginative and romantic MIND. He has blessed and enabled me to write EVERYONE of my stories, especially Broken. There’s no depth He won’t go to reach the lost. There’s no topic too taboo! Write about it and ask God for inspiration

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks also, know your voice and your style. Read widely to grow your skill and vocabulary, but don’t try to imitate someone else or preach their message. What has God given you to teach? Writing is a responsibility… Use it to His glory

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks remember to have fun! It’s serious, but not that serious. God is funloving and we have to learn to ENJOY everything we do. Don’t stress yourself when it isn’t flowing. sometimes the best ideas come when you are relaxed and having a good time

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee very vivid advice there. Thank you so much!!

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks Also, draw from your experience. As much as you can connect with your true emotions, anxieties, struggles, ambitons and values. God will teach you a lot about life and yourself as you write from your heart xoxo

mixsiefunbooks: @bluey702 I still would love to know why you struggled with the book ma’am. Pls feel free to share so we can learn from your experience with the book @ufuomaee if you can hang on a bit to sort this I’d be glad.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks@bluey702 am still here

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks My final words to everyone who has been following this correspondence is this… The answer is in the Cross! There is soooo much more to the Cross than what we learn in Church. The CROSS is the principle of dying to live… Ope had to die to self to love Promise the way she needed him to. It isn’t only Jesus that will die on a Cross… He called us to pick up our Crosses and die too. You will begin to live when you have FORSAKEN ALL! God bless and keep you. Thanks!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee Thank you so much for sharing your time with us tonight. It’s been fun and enlightening chatting with you. We wish you all the very best in the rest of your journey as a writer and as a vessel in the hands of God. Thanks and have a great night.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks thanks for the opportunity!

mixsiefunbooks: @ufuomaee The Pleasure Is All Ours.

ufuomaee: @mixsiefunbooks have an awesome night too x

mixsiefunbooks: Ok guys this is where we we it a night. If you have more questions do well to drop them here and tag whoever your question is directed to and we would answer asap. Thanks for joining us tonight and have a blessed night. Bye bye.

PS: @bluey702 later got in touch with me to say the reason she struggled with the book was because it made her too emotional.  In her words: “She [Promise] was so hurt and she hurt her husband so much”.

Photo Credit: http://www.pixabay.com

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