Are you dating no one special? Please end that relationship now! Don’t you know that who you date could end up being who you marry? Do you really want to marry Mr or Mrs No One Special???
No, I don’t think you do. That’s not only boring but drudgery! If you are Christian, you should heed my advice and stop dating just because you are bored and lonely or worried about being alone. Please, please, please, don’t sell yourself short and settle for No One Special! That is not God’s will for you.
In case you are wondering how to know if you are dating Mr or Mrs No One Special, let me give you some clues…
1. You are anxiously reading this post. So, you’re probably single and dating, and eager to discover my clues. You have your own ideas and suspicions, or in fact you know in your heart that the person you are dating is a placeholder for “the one”, because you have no real passion for them nor desire to marry them. They are just ‘there’, ‘okay’, ‘blah’…nothing special!
2. You are dating an unbeliever. Yes, this is a toss up between your Faith and the man or woman you are currently into (or who is into you). You might really like them, and are probably waiting for them to convert…or maybe you are the one considering conversion.
3. You’re engaged in sexual immorality. Well, maybe you would rather not, but because he or she wants to, you’ve had to compromise on that. Maybe you haven’t gone all the way… Maybe it’s just the kisses and touches for now. Or maybe you are the one causing them to stumble in this way. The truth is Mr or Mrs Right For You cares about your soul, and will stand their ground and flee fornication (1 Cor 6:18-20).
4. Your relationship is a secret or undefined. You don’t really know what is going on between you. One day, you think you’re together, and the next, he or she is a stranger. You constantly wonder if there is someone else. Or perhaps it is ‘complicated’ and you know there is someone else! Can you see the big flashing red sign??? Even if you think they are worth it, YOU are their “No One Special”!
5. You feel like you are sitting an exam. You are constantly walking on eggshells around this person. They are quite judgmental and critical of your flaws. They make you self-conscious and anxious about your intelligence or appearance. They believe or act like they are more intelligent, gifted and/or beautiful than you are and are putting up with you.
6. You rarely smile when you’re with them. Or even when you think of them. I mean, smile with your whole heart. You don’t laugh much either. They are either boring or you just don’t have that much in common. You don’t get each other’s jokes, and you don’t vibe.
7. They don’t touch your God-spot. You don’t connect on a deep spiritual level. Yes, you are both ‘technically’ Believers, but you disagree on several doctrinal issues. You avoid deep conversations so that you don’t argue. You don’t have real fellowship, and you do not feel edified, challenged nor inspired by them. Sometimes, you even wonder if they really believe in or have intimacy with God.
8. They make you cry. They treat you bad. They are abusive with their words and actions. They cheat and lie. The biggest lie they tell you is “I love you”. You know it is a lie, because their actions don’t add up, but you have believed their other lies that “you are not worthy” and “no one else will love you”, and have decided to take your chances on them. RUN!!! Run and seek help!
So, Sister or Brother…don’t say no one warned you before marriage. You can take or leave my advice. You can say you are just having fun… You can say you have been together for too long, and you’ve invested so much in the relationship already. Ummm…please don’t gamble your future or your eternity on a chance at a lifetime with No One Special!
Look, shit happens… So, you’ve wasted so much time already, why waste more? You or she could get pregnant (and/or even infected), and you would suffer guilt and pressure to marry. You or she may not get pregnant, but will just get more foolish from abiding with fools (yes, them and their friends – Proverbs 13:20)! So, overtime, you will compromise on your standards, and before you realise it – YOU MARRIED A FOOL. And you can’t really complain, because you were a BIGGER FOOL to marry one! You kinda fit now…
Don’t suffer fools… If he or she is No One Special, then do the kind thing and let them go. Don’t be a time waster because you are bored (Eph 5:15-17). It is selfish and cruel. Remember the golden rule…do unto others as you would have them do to you (Luke 6:31).
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