Many people think I am nice. You know, because I am Christian, they feel I ought to be nice, friendly and agreeable. And the fact that I am charitable and compassionate magnifies the perception that I am naive, easy and a push over.
Resisting other people’s urge to control me and dictate my behaviour has become a part of my character, as a defence mechanism to this view that I am nice. So, though I will not be rude nor aggressive, people who push my buttons soon learn that I am a fighter and I am strong-willed. The only thing I give myself to be controlled by is the Spirit of God.
Even still, I’ve found that most of the people who try to manipulate and control me are fellow Christians… Usually those who feel superior in the Faith or feel they have some sort of power over me because I chose to follow their leadership at one point or the other. I find that they make it hard for one to disagree with them. And when I want to defend my perspective or express my opinions around or to such people, I get anxious… shaky… sweaty… and panicky…
Read more at https://ufuomaee.blog/afraid-to-disagree/