I left my hour session with the counselor knowing I wouldn’t be going back. It seemed her counsel hinged on me believing in Jesus, and well…it just didn’t make that much sense to me. It felt good to talk it out, and get all that emotion off my chest, but like she said…I can’t be good in my own strength, unless God helps me. And for that to happen, I would have to believe in God, so we were kind of back to square one by the end of it!
But it left an impression on me though… I know it’s probably a bit superstitious, but I have been praying that if God is real, He should prove Himself to me undeniably. And I continued to try to resist my urges, and focus on “whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable” like she advised me to, based on advice from the Bible. It worked for a while. About three days actually.
I was disappointed with myself when I finally gave in again and presented myself at Tony’s apartment, in need of a good servicing…
Read more at http://blog.ufuomaee.org/broken-part-three/